You guys, I don't even know what's going on. Yesterday I was Supermom, feeding pasta casserole to a bunch of teenage soccer players having a blast playing raunchy music and running through my backyard, sorry about the dog poop I forgot to clean up. Then when I awoke this morning my anxiety is like at a rave or something, I'm dialed up to 11 over so many dumb things. I'm worried about my kids, because they also seem to be anxious -I don't know why they only have 5000 tasks they have to do perfectly every day just to function as expected, right?
Today I was supposed to teach concepts of Active Intruder training to middle schoolers and I couldn't even do it, I was glued to my chair while my teaching partner handled the entire thing. It makes me angry, and it isnt fair, and they shouldn't have to be taught this but here we are.
Tonight I'm going to see U2 at Arrowhead Stadium, isn't that awesome? Aren't I lucky? I'm so lucky. And yet my entire body has been quivering with dread on the edge of a panic attack all day because, OMG THAT'S A LOT OF NOISE AND PEOPLE and I can't breathe.
I cannot breathe.
Just breathe.