Mad World.

I realize I haven't posted here in a while. Most of my quarantine thoughts have played out on Facebook. But recently I hit my wall of "this is ridiculous, what is even happening?" So, here we are.

 

 

Last summer I was preparing to go on a trip to France as a chaperone with my son's high school band. I was shopping at our local Bag & Baggage store, looking for a good crossbody bag that could hold all of my goodies, but not be super heavy. I was there late in the evening, close to closing time, and it was just me and the manager in the store. We started chatting about my trip, just conversation as she showed me some options then left me to browse.

Somehow we got on the topic of someone I know who has a thing for Tumi briefcases. Now this person has a whole selection of really nice leather briefcases in a bin in the basement. Things he doesn't use anymore, but can't seem to get rid of. I was complaining because I know these things take up space and they're never going to get used again, they should be donated, some of them are broken, they would need to be fixed before they could be used again. But this guy just can't let them go. In fact, if you bring it up, an absolute temper tantrum will ensue. And as she was walking around the store tidying up her racks, she started telling me stories of people that she knows that love their Tumi bags, they are after all very high quality and can last forever if cared for properly. But then she mentioned people get attached to their things, it's hard to let go.

And as she said that, I absentmindedly mentioned that it might be because his parents divorced when he was away at college, and got rid of all his stuff when they sold the family home and split up their households.

She stopped what she was doing and turned to look at me.

"Honey." She said softly. I looked up at the change in tone. "He has baggage."

It gave me goosebumps.

Oh my God. He literally has emotional baggage manifesting in his baggage.

 

Now, watch as I tie this into teachers returning to school this fall.

 

We've been through a lot to be teachers. We go through a specific teacher education program, with a rosy outlook plan to love and teach young minds to prepare them for the real world. And then we get into the classroom where we discover that over half of that gets thrown out, because technology changes constantly, districts update guidelines, reading programs and new math every 2 years. Then throw out the other half of what we learned about student engagement, because our biggest worry will be keeping our little loves alive.

 

Every time there is a school shooting, teachers get a little more PTSD. In fact, the rise in school shootings have completely changed how we teach and function in schools. Our biggest fear used to be tornadoes that might hit before we could get everyone into the safe place. Now it's that we may have to choose to die throwing our bodies in front of our roomful of children.

These are split second decisions. Decisions we all know we could make in the fraction of a second. It's a terrible ask, but it would also be over immediately.

Now you want us to plan to die, while learning, juggling and managing completely new teaching methods. Maybe. But not on purpose. Some may get sick and die immediately, some possibly further down the road. You want us to traumatize our kids in the process in the name of prevention by hiding our expressions that helo convey safety and love. And you want us to do this every single day, for months on end, not knowing if these new procedures will or won't keep us protected.

 

Maslow's hierarchy details how the brain can't learn unless basic needs are met. Basic needs include food, shelter, safety. We all learned this in our teacher training, including district administrators. We apply this ti students every day. Yet, teachers are being asked- no, told - to function without their safety needs met.

 

Our desire to be healthy and our will to live has become baggage. Many have already drawn that line and said no, this is too much. Many will try to make it work. Though I plan to give this a shot, I'd like to hang on to what health I have left, I have already given up so much in terms of my personal health. I am someone for whom this disease could potentially be more dangerous. 

 

We should all be ashamed it has come to this. But if you've been online lately, you know the savagery directed at teachers who have tried to raise alarms doesn't remotely show that.